coach john continues the conversation from The Key: Life long learning with Mike Wlotzki about Mike’s recent experiences of being with Carolyn, his wife, in the sadness when their beloved family dog, Zeus recently passed away unexpectedly. Mike and Carolyn have been best friends and married for 28 years, with 3 grown children.
Next Up: Mike shares his secret for ongoing satisfaction with his vital role of Director of Funding with Make a Wish Eastern Ontario
:33 “Walk me through it, Mike”
Hope – having a new way of looking at it
“Zeus was 13 years old and just eyes and 20 pounds of unconditional love”
2:38 Being there
Sometimes it wasn’t even a conflict, it was just a story, an issue. I became more centered, more present.
To be there for her, to be present with her. Making a conscious decision to be calm, loving and caring.
4:30 Not needing to be “Mr. Fix-it”
Being present when emotional levels rise, with choice. Sharing wisdom with many years of marriage, Mike understands that there is an opportunity to listen deeply without saying anything to make the discomfort of intense emotions go away.
I’m a “solutions” kind of guy but I’ve learned through these life practices that it doesn’t work. I was just there for her.
5:12 How the 5 step process works in an emotional situation
“Letting the experience moment by moment exist”
6:48 Awareness of being present
“The request of myself was from my heart, not my head. You say it best when you say nothing at all and I was just there.”
7:16 A signature moment
The “ROI” of learning Conflict Evolution, for powerful moments
8:00 Slow down to make heart-felt decisions instead of reactive decisions
9:00 A lot of the work is really about ourselves
strong>10:27 Trusting the process
Letting ourselves and the process and the moment be enough.
Please share a comment below.
Have you had an opportunity to just be with someone, not needing to fix how they are feeling?